| People often ask me how I got interested in the | | | | huge lock surrounded by gigantic, terrifying |
| topic of river cruising. Some of the blame goes to | | | | raft-smashing chains of grain-filled barges; or |
| Mark Twain and his tales of the Mississippi, but | | | | almost being swamped by the wakes of the huge |
| only a small part. The truth is a more interesting | | | | barges they met; or of the huge northern pike - |
| story that goes back to the days of yore, when | | | | more likely a sturgeon - they "almost" caught - |
| people actually did things. | | | | and pulled one of them overboard. |
| Several older, but maybe not wiser, friends of | | | | Perhaps the most frightening event happened |
| mine from our tiny village in central Iowa, decided | | | | near St. Louis when they were in the center of a |
| to traverse the entire 2300 miles of the mighty | | | | terrible storm that destroyed the "out-house." |
| Mississippi River. | | | | That was almost enough to make them decide it |
| It was impossible to make the trip in one shot, so | | | | wasn't worth the effort. |
| they decide to do it in segments. Their plan was | | | | But they prevailed. Year after year. |
| to start at Minneapolis and float as far as they | | | | I went off to the Army and never heard any |
| could during their week's vacation time and then | | | | details of the downriver leg of the tale. However, |
| start the next year from where they had left off. | | | | they kept the dream alive each year, 200 miles |
| At less than 200 miles per week, it would take at | | | | by 200 miles. Finally some time later, my mother |
| least a dozen years to accomplish the entire | | | | sent me a newspaper clipping: "the boys" and raft |
| journey. | | | | had finally cruised successfully into New Orleans |
| They built a raft of two giant war surplus rubber | | | | and they were on their way home - via bus. |
| pontoons somehow bolted and lashed together. It | | | | It would be nice to believe that there was some |
| was topped by a wooden lean-to and propelled by | | | | sort of recognition of the journey, but there was |
| a tiny outboard engine. Sitting on its trailer, it | | | | none. At the very least, the raft belongs in a |
| looked like an out-house riding on two giant | | | | maritime museum. |
| 30-foot long hot dogs. These obviously were men | | | | Instead, somewhere on the bottom of the Gulf |
| of great courage - or stupidity. | | | | of Mexico rests this wonderful makeshift rickety |
| I followed this epic for several years, listening to | | | | raft. A raft that has the distinct honor of outdoing |
| their tales after they returned home as they | | | | the imaginary feats of Tom Sawyer and |
| unloaded, deflated, and dried out their equipment. | | | | Huckleberry Finn. As for me, oft-tempted, but |
| Tying up on the riverbank and sleeping overnight | | | | deciding against repeating the trip, probably in a |
| on hard, solid ground may sound reasonable to | | | | comfortable house-boat, I settled on writing this |
| some; however, to me it seemed that was more | | | | article about it. Much safer by far, but not quite as |
| like a long, wet, camping trip. | | | | exciting. |
| They told tales about nearly being crushed in a | | | | |